You’ll Shoot Your Eye Out! If TripAdvisor Rated Evil Santa

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after they visit

Good morning! This weekend, my children took me to the movies as part of an early Christmas present. They know that my favorite holiday movie is “A Christmas Story” and so when my middle son noticed a that there was a special showing at a local theater chain, he knew we had to go. In addition to a great afternoon, I also came up with a fun idea for this weeks Monday Morning blog.

If you have never seen the movie, you should. Originally released in 1983 and set in the 1940s, A Christmas Story is the story of a young boy named Ralphie who attempts to convince his parents, his teacher, and Santa that a Red Ryder B.B. gun really is the perfect Christmas gift. One of my favorite scenes in the movie occurs when Ralphie goes for a visit with Santa. If you aren’t familiar with the scene, click play below to watch.

As I watched this scene again, I thought to myself, good thing TripAdvisor wasn’t around then! I wonder what kind of reviews those parents would have written. That’s when I had the idea to write my own reviews for the fictional parents. Of course I wrote each of these reviews keeping the original scene in mind but updating the language to match what we might expect if Higbee’s Santa were around today. Here are the reviews—enjoy!

Higbee’s Department Store—Santa Experience




"Worst Santa Ever!"


I have two children and we visited Higbee’s on Saturday night. My younger child, Randy, was so terrified that he began crying right away. The elf helper didn’t even take the time to console him. Instead, he just tossed him down the slide--uncaring!

My older child did get to talk with Santa. However, when we met up with him at the bottom of the slide, he had a boot print on his face.

My children are both having nightmares. Do not go here!



"Need Priority Line Pass for Child with Disability"

My child has ADHD and doesn’t function well when forced to wait in long lines. You should offer a priority line for people with this condition. We are awaiting your response.



"Santa was SAUCED!"

Higbee’s Santa smelled of Whisky and cigars... Will not return!



"Santa needs anger management class!"

You should train your Santa not to get so mad at kids when they get scared. My child got scared and peed on Santa’s lap. I understand why Santa became angry but he should really learn to count to ten. This is what we are teaching our children to do.

Quality, service, cleanliness, and value.

Cavett Robert

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